The Holidays is usually a time of year where everyone is so happy, loving and filled with cheer. Or so many would believe, or maybe not. I am in the category of the percentage that does not enjoy Thanksgiving and Christmas. Not because of he bah humbug thing. But it is a constant reminder of the not so good times in my life. Yes I could just get over it, but it is too hard to just get over. For example every year before Thanksgiving I listen to Christmas music and feel so overjoyed with the Christmas holidays coming up. Well putting up the tree after Thanksgiving, listening to music, just thrills me, but when December comes, it is so hard to bare. It starts with my Son’s birthday on December 1st and then my daughter’s birthday on December 11th. On the 11th we go to the place she was buried to put a plant on her grave. She passed on December 26th the day after Christmas and it is so hard for me to be joyous with my daughter Angel, because I miss my other daughter and not to mention the other child I lost. I cry all month long at work, at home, church and yet no one notices, so l think.
When I was younger I enjoyed Christmas day, coming down and being surprised and now not so much anymore because as soon as I feel good about it, I regret it being over. I know what the next day is. I am not trying to put a damper on your Christmas Holiday season. I pray your day is full of love, much happiness and joy. I am thankful for my Son and my daughter I just can’t fill the void. So my Christmas will be just “The Holidays”….